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PSYCHOLOGY OF LOVE. Articles


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"Daughter of great knowledge", called love
by Leonardo da Vinci

The psychology of love between a man and a woman is the main topic of our site, therefore it is placed in two sections, this and

Psychology of love. Books and Videos , which can be downloaded for free from our library "Love, family, sex and about ...".

All articles are collected here, they are grouped by topic and commented on.

Contents:

Aspect 1. The accumulated knowledge is enough to understand what is intersexual individual love!

Aspect 2. An important ability of the new psychology of love is that it allows you to accurately separate love from pseudo-loving experiences, falling in love and frustration.

Aspect 3. Psychological health is a prerequisite for love.

Aspect 4. Ecology of the culture of love. Another important contribution of E. Fromm is that he showed how the social structure affects the meaningful part of love and its place in a person's personal life.

Aspect 5. More precisely, a new psychosexology. In the twentieth century, so many discoveries were made in sexology, especially female sexology, that one can say: "there was no sex before this."

Aspect 1.

The accumulated knowledge is enough to understand what is intersexual individual love!

Briefly about love. E. Pushkarev

happy family. Psychology of love Intersexual individual love throughout all the previous millennia remained a mysterious phenomenon, despite the fact that the best minds of mankind tried to reveal it, only because

Obviously, the term "love" unites qualitatively different relationships.
K.psh.n. L. Gozman.

They could not single out, explore and describe these constituent parts of love until the middle of the twentieth century.

The Psychology of Love. Z. Freud Freud made more than one attempt to solve the love riddle, but since he was a psychiatrist to the core and understood the mentally ill better than the healthy, so even for him this nut was too much for him. But nevertheless, he made an important hint that the mountains of books written by poets (writers and other "artists") about the attractions and events between men and women are fantasies, artistic images, the result of "poetic freedom" that do not explain love in any way. And what is love and what is sexuality can only be determined by scientists after dispassionate scientific research.

Sigmund Freud about love.

Freudianism, psychoanalysis. L. Stolyarenko

Freud: the origins of lust. D. Ackerman

Psychoanalysis and the degradation of romantic love. S. Michell

Falling in love and hypnosis. S. Freud

Paradoxes of love. V. Medvedev

Freud and Eros. Rollo May

Freud and Puritanism. Rollo May

Sigmund Freud's concept of sexuality. V.M. Rosin

Psychoanalytic views on love. P. Cutter

The most breakthrough contribution to uncovering the mysteries of the psychology of love was made by Erich Fromm, whose work undoubtedly influenced subsequent research on this topic. It is for this reason that E. Fromm's photo was placed on our website in the most conspicuous place.

Rene Descartes said: "Determine the meanings of words, and you will save humanity from half of its delusions."

E. Fromm, in order to determine the meaning of the word "love", introduced and explained new qualifying terms and concepts:
"true love", "fruitful love", "mature love", the most fundamental type of love, which forms the basis of all types of love, is "brotherly love";
and many sensual near-love experiences: "pseudo-love", "falling in love is one of the forms of pseudo-love", "there are many individual forms of pathology of love", "unproductive, or irrational love", "love-worship", "fake love", "sentimental love", "neurotic love", "immature form of love" or "symbiotic union". With this alone, he more than half solved the centuries-old riddle

Erich Fromm about love (excerpts from books)

The art of love. E. Fromm (fragments)

Especially highlighted signs of love from E. Fromm and comments.

Systematization of E. Fromm's love

Definition of love and its signs.

Pseudo-love.

Falling in love is one of the forms of pseudo-love.

Steps of mastering the art of love, offered by E. Fromm.

Criticism of E. Fromm's ideas and proposals.

Rating of E. Fromm's ideas and discoveries.

functional magnetic resonance imaging After E. Fromm, an advanced team of anthropologists, neuropsychologists, neurochemists, neurobiologists, psychotherapists, philosophers, and other professionals, using the latest biochemical analyzes and equipment - functional magnetic resonance imaging, managed to fully reveal the mystery of the psychology of love.

About Professor Helen Fisher and true love.

Tomography of love

The chemistry of love. Components of attraction, infatuation, affection, and separation. D. Amen

And thus to understand "The essence of love" is a qualitatively new, perfect person who once scared Zeus, capable to a significant "work of love" for "replenishing one's own and other life", through "healing the flaws of human nature and restoring them."

active areas of the brain of loving people The work of researchers at Stony Brook University in New York has proven that love has no statute of limitations. Using magnetic resonance imaging, specialists examined the chemical processes in the brain of young couples and couples who have lived together for more than 20 years. And it turned out that in married couples living in a happy marriage, the level of dopamine is as high as in people who have just met and are experiencing love.
Dopamine - a hormone produced in the adrenal glands is responsible, among other things, for "the pleasure of life and joy."

A romantic love feeling consists of several components: psychological, physiological, somato-vegetative, and others. Most of these components can be accurately measured by modern methods, so that today we can determine the strength of love feelings.
Psychotherapist, sexologist Ph. D. Sci., Professor A.M. Poleev.

If E. Fromm called falling in love pseudo-love, then Dr. Morgan Scott Peck specified that falling in love is "a genetically predetermined instinctive component of mating." In animals and birds, it is called rut, "mating season", mating, etc. in humans, it is called falling in love, "affective attraction." Affectus (lat.) - emotional excitement, passion. Attraction (eng) emotional attraction.

Falling in love belongs to the animal nature of man, love to his maturity.
Professor, psychotherapist V. Albisetti
Therefore, falling in love is not the first stage of love, but an independent state that has nothing to do with love, something that a person inherited from previous animal species.

And a person does not have an innate gift to distinguish love from falling in love, other pseudo-loving experiences.

Human and chimpanzee genes overlap by more than 99%.

The Psychology of Love. Morgan Scott Peck Therefore, we can assume that Dr. Morgan Scott Peck, with his research and the book "UNBROWNED ROAD, a new psychology of love, traditional values and spiritual development" (The book is in our library )

The myth of romantic love. Morgan Scott Peck

Love is not a feeling. Morgan Scott Peck

Love is disciplined. Morgan Scott Peck

Love is separation. Morgan Scott Peck

laid the foundations for a new psychology of love. In which there is a clear and unambiguous difference: love from many types natural love , low-quality loves or pseudo-loving states.

Classifications of love relationships. E. Pushkarev

Natural love. E. Pushkarev

What is love. E. Pushkarev

Briefly about love. E. Pushkarev

The concept of "love". E. Pushkarev

Various feelings of love and being in love. E. Pushkarev

The essence of love. E. Pushkarev.

Is love an emotion, feeling or what? E. Pushkarev

If to eliminate the confusion of love with pseudo-loves. E. Pushkarev

How to distinguish love from falling in love and other pseudo-lovers. E. Pushkarev

Falling in love. E. Pushkarev

I fell in love ... Memo to a man in love. E. Pushkarev

What is love as a kind of psychological reality? L. Gozman, N. Azhgikhina

V. Frankl about love. M. Litvak

LOVE. E. Kirchler

Falling in love and love. V. Albisetti

K.S. Lewis

Falling in love (explains the ethologist). V. Dolnik

Dramatic falls in love of famous people that did not make them happy.
                Abelard and Eloise
                Raphael and Fornarina
                Petrarch and Laura
                Denis Diderot and Anna
                Balzac and Ghana
                Frederic Chopin and Georges Sand
                I.S. Turgenev and P. Viardot
                Ivan Andreevich Krylov and Anyuta
                Alfred Nobile and Sophie Hess
                Sophia Kovalevskaya
                Galina Dyakova and Paul Eluard
                Galina Dyakova and Salvador Dali
                Zh-P. Sartre and S. de Beauvoir
                V. Mayakovsky and L. Brik
                A. Blok and L. Mendeleeva
                S. Yesenin and A. Duncan
                P. Picasso and O. Khokhlova
                A. Hitler and E. Brown
                A. Pugacheva and F. Kirkorov
                L. Senchina and I. Talkov

These dramatic falling in love, like most amorous plots from literary works, are love addictions and other pseudo-love disorders. They are well studied there are tests not only to identify them,

Test for detecting love addiction according to Egorov.
Screening test for sexual addiction according to Carnes.

but also persons predisposed to them:

Individual psychological determinants of love addiction in girls. S.Skvortsova

Love addiction among university students: connection with other dependent behaviors and personal autoaggression. O. Zh. Buzik, A.D. Efimova

Unfortunately, the love that is sung in literary sources and is a role model is precisely love addiction. The stories of Romeo and Juliet, Petrarch and Laura, Jose and Carmen, Anna Karenina and Vronsky and other excellent descriptions of such relationships show people exactly what true love should be. Full of suffering and anxiety, obstacles and humiliation, most likely without prospects and flowing like sand. The vast majority of love songs are about addictive relationships. The series, in which the heroes overcome almost impossible obstacles, suffer from bullying and betrayal, and in the end get what they want, praise the love addiction. People from childhood are brought up on such examples, forming a stereotype that true love can and should be unhappy and full of suffering.
Ph.D. A.L. Fedosov "Love Addiction", Institute of Psychology named after G.S. Kostyuk APN Ukraine

Another article with similar statements Love vs pseudo-love, or about love addiction. S. Clemin

But worst of all, these pathological passions are imposed not only by culture, but also by the school Psychiatric confusion with love in school literature. E. Pushkarev

Love addictions - A large collection of articles and books on love addiction, which our culture often calls “addictive love” “overselective love”, “neurotic love”, “too much love”, “more than love "," Compulsive love "," toxic love ", etc. and people suffering from these disorders.

And E. Fromm rightly called all this "individual forms of the pathology of love."

After the study, they were entered into the International Classifier of Diseases (ICD-10) in section F63. "Habit and impulse disorders" is a classification of non-chemical forms of addictive behavior:
1. Pathological attraction to gambling (gambling).
2. Erotic addiction.
2.1. Love addictions.
2.2. Sexual addiction.
3. "Socially acceptable" addictions:
3.1. Workaholism.
3.2. Sports addiction (exercise addiction).
3.3. Relationship addiction.
3.4. Addiction to spending money (shopping).
3.5. Religious addiction.
further on the list of ICD.

For several decades, doctors have been issuing bulletins on disability due to illness - "love addiction".

Is love a disease? E. Pushkarev

Poor quality falling in love - mania. E. Pushkarev.

Poor quality falling in love - ludus. E. Pushkarev.

Poor quality falling in love - eros. E. Pushkarev

The second stage of love mania and Anna Karenina. E. Pushkarev

How to get rid of "love"? E. Pushkarev

Love and sexual addiction. A. Tarayants

and others

It should be noted that love addictions are not categories of immutability and rigidity, they are curable if you act under the guidance of professionals and purposefully. Now, if Anna Karenina turned to a modern psychotherapist or clinical psychologist for help, her disorder would be cured, and she would return to normal life, to the delight of her children and herself.

Love addiction is a type of additive behavior with fixation on one person, perceived as passionate love. This behavioral disorder leads to the impossibility of starting a family or destroys the family, to conflicts, crimes, suicide, psychosomatic and neurotic disorders. Patients with this disorder rarely seek psychological and medical help due to the low publicity of this disorder. Therefore, it is very important for the prevention of love addiction to inform the population about this disease and the differences between normal love and love addiction.
Candidate of Medical Sciences, Associate Professor of the Department of Psychiatry S. I. Voroshilin

One of the surprises that continues to shape the new psychology of love is the discovery of ethologist and Nobel laureate Konrad Lorenz that the first love was experienced not by Homo sapiens at all, but at least by gray geese, i.e. several million years earlier. And after we get acquainted with how gray geese love, some animals, for example, field mice.

History of the culture of love feelings. E. Pushkarev.

it will be useful, first of all, for philosophers, , otherwise they have gone too far with the search for the meaning of love:

“Horror surrounds love in the history of the world. This horror is double: the horror of the world's attitude to love, the torture to which it is subjected by society: and the horror that it brings into the world, its inner horror. The social horror of love associated with the despotism of the hierarchical organization of society can be, if not completely overcome, then reduced to a minimum. But the metaphysical horror of love in this world is irresistible. There is something deadly in love ... ”. Nikolay Berdyaev

and other people have a lot to learn from our smaller brothers.

The continuation of K. Lorenz's discovery is another important discovery made by anthropologists, neurochemists and historians. Lust, Freudian libido, sexual attraction are all an important component of falling in love, a genetically predetermined instinctive component of mating, and therefore sexual attraction is not directly related to love.

Just that you got acquainted with the statement of the philosopher N. Berdyaev about love, but the definition of love by the philosopher V.S. Solovyov: "... the attraction of an animate being to another in order to connect with him and mutually replenish life." How are they really very different? Therefore, we have collected on seven pages a variety of definitions of love in order to independently determine which of them is right, more precisely.

Definitions of love from explanatory dictionaries.

Definition of love. "Great Encyclopedia of Psychiatry" V. Zhmurov

Definition of love. "Psychological Encyclopedia". R. Corsini, A. Auerbach.

Definition of love. "Dictionary of the Practical Psychologist". S. Golovin

Definition of love based on its antinomical understanding. O. Otradnova

Definition of love - philological analysis. E. Balashova

Definition of love in psychoanalytic dictionaries.

Professor of Anthropology H. Fischer: “I came to the conviction that romantic love is the primary motivational system in the brain, in short, the basic human attraction to mating. Like cravings, romantic love focuses on the reward: the beloved, just as hunger focuses on food".

H. Fischer: “Romantic love is deeply intertwined with two other attraction to mating: lust - a passionate desire for sexual satisfaction and affection - a sense of peace, security and union with a partner for a long time (18-30 months). Each of these basic drives travels along different paths in the brain. Each generates different behaviors, hopes and dreams. And each is associated with a different neurochemistry".

It can be specified that "romantic love" in our society is called natural love, experienced in accordance with cultural norms and rituals that are constantly transforming. At this time, in Western culture, the macro-amorous trend of "romantic love" is changing to "confluent love".

"Romantic love": aspects, analysis and consequences. E Pushkarev.

All articles about romantic love, almost an encyclopedia.

Intimacy transformation. Sexuality, love and eroticism in modern societies. E. Giddens

The ideal of romantic love in the "post-romantic era" R. G. Apresyan

Book review: E. Giddens. Transformation of Intimacy. Sexuality, love and eroticism in modern societies. E. Vovk

The concept of romantic love in Western European culture: retrospectives, perspectives. O. Karpacheva

A number of important discoveries explaining the internal mechanisms of love and their practical application are revealed: "Socionics of love"

"The dual nature of man" A. Augustinavichute.
        The nature of erotic feelings
        Problems of psychological complementarity
        Love Consciousness
        What gives a person a mental supplement.
        Manifestation of feelings in premarital friendship.

"How love is viewed in socionics" E. Pushkarev

16 types in love. J. Tewson, O. Kroeger.

Duality is a vital necessity. A. Grechinsky, T. Pedan.

Table of relations between sociotypes A. Augustinavichiute.
Recommendations for the best, worst and all other combinations for love and marriage.

Slogans and slogans about love.

Temperaments in love. Most! Most!

Sexual preferences of psychotypes.

Sexual compatibility of socionic psychotypes. A.V. Bukalova, A.G. Boyko

Riddles of sexual compatibility. V.V. Meged.

Sexual characteristics of introverts / extroverts. L. Akimova

Dualization and sex: on the problem of the optimal choice of a life partner. A. Shiyan

Summary.

1. Much will become clear if we first consider "natural love" , and then "cultural love" , and then what kind of connection exists between them. Natural love as a phenomenon, in the semantic field of the same name occupies a small, peripheral place, and is there, as Cinderella. And in the first roles, pseudo-loving passions rule the ball in this field, substandard love, pathologies that do not have to her a direct relationship, but outwardly somewhat similar.

2. The unification of sexual individual love and sex within the framework of a single phenomenon turned out to be an idea not of nature, but of man. The concept of the wife's fidelity in marriage happened only with the onset of the slave system (4th - 3rd millennium BC), and before that there was promiscuity. And for the first time, the Roman poets Ovid and Horace began to write about loyalty in love in the 1st century. BC.

"I am sure that the whole in love is not sexual attraction, bodily pleasure, communication or family, but a person (the subject of love is a person), therefore, everything listed in love is transformed and established in a new way." Doctor of Philosophy V.M. Rozin. Film The same idea was expressed in his own way by another Doctor of Philosophy. L.V. Zharov: “Love, in essence, does not need bodily contact. Moreover, the body is often the main obstacle to love, especially in its physiological manifestations. For love, it would be better to have an ethereal, angelic body, or what people should find in paradise".

Love and lust.

But there is no falling in love without sexual attraction.

If there is no sex drive, this is not real love.
by Dorothy Tennov "Love and Limerence".

First, falling in love is a specific, sexually oriented, erotic experience.
Dr. Morgan Scott Peck

3. Sexual passion is characteristic of both natural love, and Poor quality falling in love she is "addictive love", "overselective love", "neurotic love", "too much love", "more than love", "Compulsive love", "toxic love", etc. these are psychological, even mental disorders, which, with sufficient goodwill of the patient himself, are quite successfully cured.
And passion has nothing to do with love as well as falling in love.

Passion cannot be friends with deep love,
If he can, then they will not be together for long.
Omar Khayam

Even earlier, Plato taught that passion (pathos in Greek) is an aspect that only distracts from the essence of love.

Above it was told about the main - the most difficult, first aspect of the new psychology of love - the discoveries made in the second half of the twentieth century.

Aspect 2.

An important ability of the new psychology of love is that it allows you to accurately separate love from pseudo-loving experiences, falling in love and frustration.

And it's better to start with E. Fromm's definition, which he made ten years before he wrote his famous book The Art of Love. 1956 :
"Love is a fruitful form of relationship to others and to oneself. It involves caring, responsibility, respect and knowledge, as well as the desire for the other person to grow and develop. It is a manifestation of closeness between two human beings, provided that the integrity of each of them is maintained." ...

Is love an emotion, feeling or what? E. Pushkarev

It became clear The essence of love. E. Pushkarev

Love test: "love scale" by Z. Rubin. E. Pushkarev

True love, it is also compatible love. E. Pushkarev
More examples of true love.
                Natasha Rostova and Pierre Bezukhov.
                Charles Chaplin and Una O "Neal.
                Tikhon Nikolaevich and Klara Arnoldovna Khrennikovs.
                Ronald and Nancy Reagan.
                Boris Nikolaevich and Naina Iosifovna Yeltsin.
                Mikhail Sergeevich and Raisa Maksimovna Gorbachev.
                Maya Plisetskaya and Rodion Shchedrin.
                Ekaterina Maximova and Vladimir Vasiliev
                Paul and Linda McCartney
                Igor and Alla Ugolnikov
                Garik and Olga Sukachev

Friendship + Love = Filia. E. Pushkarev

Culture of longevity of love. A culture of separation grief. E. Pushkarev

From disharmony in choosing a marriage partner to harmony. E. Pushkarev

Harmonious relationships, from sympathy to love. E. Gavrilova

How to distinguish love from falling in love and other pseudo-lovers. E. Pushkarev

If to eliminate the confusion of love with pseudo-loves. E. Pushkarev

Man and woman: relationships. E. Pushkarev

Man and woman: compatibility, love. E. Pushkarev

How to understand a guy. E. Pushkarev

Aspect 3.

Psychological health is a prerequisite for love. E. Pushkarev

With a high - creative level of psychological health, a person easily finds true love, and if the level is low - maladaptive, this is already a direct road to erotic addiction. With an average - adaptive, level of psychological health, you already need to work hard to find love, more often this happens through correcting the mistakes of youth.

Appearance and other factors affecting love feelings. E. Pushkarev

Height and weight of famous, famous women.

Whoever likes it. E. Pushkarev

"Love" and mental health professionals. Stephen B. Levine.

About self-love. E. Pushkarev

Neurotic need for love. Karen Horney.

Love addiction. K. Horney, P. Kutter, O. Murzina.

Addiction (compulsive) love. M. Litvak

Healthy and addictive love. M. Litvak

"Love" neurotic. M. Litvak. ;

"Love is a rare thing." M. Litvak

Why don't normal men come across ?. M. Litvak

Aspect 4.

Ecology of the culture of love. Another important contribution of E. Fromm is that he showed how the social structure affects the meaningful part of love and its place in a person's personal life.

About the destructive influence of the "consumer society" on sexual love. E. Fromm

Love and its decay in modern society. E. Fromm.

"Cultural love" E. Pushkarev

Ecology of the culture of love. E. Pushkarev

        Dramaturgy of love. E. Pushkarev

        This is a malicious word "love". E. Pushkarev

        The concept of love in polyamory: components of a discourse on multiple love relationships. K. Klesse

        "Romantic love": aspects, analysis and consequences. E Pushkarev

        Consumer society and its antilove essence. E. Pushkarev

You can start describing this aspect with a quote from the philosopher and publicist Mikhail Osipovich Menshikov, written at the end of the 19th century, but today they sound even more relevant than more than a century ago. Unfortunately, today's journalism has not yet reached the cultural level of the century before last.

“The truth of sexual love could have been clarified without great efforts, if it were not for the immobile, centuries-old cult of this love, inherited from the ancient chivalry, dominated in our world outlook, if not for the darkness in which love is obscured by incompetent and immoral writers, poets, guardians bad traditions - all those who affirm the world outlook in humanity at this time".

Literature has played a huge role in the love cult. M.O. Menshikov

Superstitions and the truth of love. M.O. Menshikov

In our time, due to the complication of cultural meanings, excessive fetishization, demonization on the one hand and unrestrained sexualization on the other, the situation with the ecology of love has become much worse.
"It turns out that America is the only country in the world where love is a national issue. It seems that a huge number of Americans of both sexes are in a state of confusion about love" Raul de Roussy de Seims.

"Indeed, love has become such an intrinsically contradictory phenomenon that some researchers of family life have concluded that 'love' is simply the name for the way stronger family members subdue weaker ones. Ronald Laing simply argues that love is a cover for violence." "LOVE AND WILL" by Rollo May. Of course, these statements refer only to the so-called. civilized countries into the ranks of which Russia has not yet entered, but is trying very hard.

We. The deepest aspects of romantic love. Robert A. Johnson. Fragments.
"Love has already been turned into a religion. Human love is so darkened by the excessive suffering and experiences of romanticism that we are deprived of the opportunity to treat it the way it deserves."
"Love will not suffer if it is freed from the romantic belief system. The prestige of love will only be strengthened if it is distinguished from romance."
"One of the great paradoxes of romantic love is that it has nothing to do with earthly relationships."

What is love, what is romance and what is the difference between them. Robert A. Johnson.

One of the basic needs of a modern person is to learn to distinguish between earthly love, which is the basis of any relationship, and romantic love ... Robert A. Johnson.

One of the greatest paradoxes of romantic love is that it has nothing to do with earthly relationships. Robert A. Johnson.

Romantic love, following its paradoxical nature, constantly fools us. Robert A. Johnson.

The myth of romantic love. Morgan Scott Peck

Man and woman: leadership in love and marriage. E. Pushkarev

"First love" is an important step in puberty. E. Pushkarev

Psychiatric confusion with love in school literature. E. Pushkarev

Is "first love" real ? A. Babin, N. Anikina

Dynamics and factors of ideas about love and marriage among young people. M. Kushcheva, A. Guyo, O. Sergeeva, V. Ryabushkina.

The idea of love for a husband (wife), boyfriend (girlfriend) among young people. T. Andreeva

Adultery from different sides. E. Pushkarev

Demystifying love. A. Orlov

Open question: what do you think love is?

Deficient love and love of life A. Maslow. R.Frager, D.Fademan

Love and self-actualization. A. Maslow

On the problem of psychological research of the meaning of love: methodology, hypotheses, methods, results. E. Varaksina, L. Demina

Triangular theory of love. R. J. Strenberg

Mature sexy love and sexy couple. Otto Kernberg.

The paradox of passion: she loves him, but he doesn't. Dean Kelis, K. Phillips.

Gender aspects of the phenomenon of love. S. Turutina

Lies and love in the imaginations of young people. D. Pogontseva, A. Chugui

The consequence of a bad ecology of love is.
“In recent years, wherever I go to meet with statesmen and religious leaders, asking them what is the biggest problem in their country, I usually get the same answer: the state of the family. in the Caribbean, in South America, in the United States, in Israel - wherever I go - family breakdown is a universal problem.
That the institution of the family is subject to such attacks by the enemy should not surprise us. The disintegration of the family will lead to the collapse of civilization. The family is the first and fundamental unit of human society. "Dr. Miles Monroe.

Psychotherapy of family relationships.

Marital love therapy. V. Albisetti

Twelve rules for healthy love. Tracy Cabot.

Five languages of love. Geri Chapman (with abbreviations)

How to keep love. Vaughan James & Peggy

A life-long honeymoon. Wolffolk Joan

Intimate enemy: how to quarrel honestly in love and marriage. George R. Bach

Summary.

To sum up the harmful ecology of the culture of love can only be done with sad statistics:

“From 1950 to 2002, there was a rapid upward trend in divorce in Russia, the“ boiling point ”was recorded in 2002 - 84 out of 100 marriages broke up. This was followed by a decline, but the upward trend in divorce rates in Russia continues, which indicates the existence of a serious demographic threat". Doctor of Social Sciences Professor A.V. Vereshchagin,

In a number of cases, divorce is not the worst in family history, even the term was coined by "prisoners of marriage."

“Now (1999 the trend is growing) half of young families break up in the first year of life, two thirds - in the first five years, in 70% of families that have not yet broken up, the spouses are in tense relations ...".
D.philos.n. V.M. Rozin "Problems of love in the context of the contradictions of the modern family."

According to the UN demographic yearbook 2012, Russia is the first in the world in terms of the number of divorces. Further Belarus, Ukraine, Moldova. On the 5th - the Cayman Islands. On the 6th - the USA.

And this is what the situation with love looks like in non-disintegrated families:

“According to official statistics, we have 70 divorces per 100 marriages. And I say that 100% of marriages are divorces. We don't have families as such. It's just that people live in the same territory, isolated from each other.
We have such families that only the outer shell keeps people together. I researched families where the marriage lasted 10-15 years, and asked, asked a question of this type: "You would now marry your husband, but only everything will happen again as it was." And vice versa. As a result, only 5% of men did not regret having married this woman. And 9% of women. But, let's say, I agree to marry her, and my wife would not marry me now, if on a new one. So out of 11,400 families, there are five of them, where there is a mutual choice". (Total less than 0.5%)
Corresponding Member of the Russian Academy of Natural Sciences, MD, psychotherapist M.E. Litvak "Love is a rare thing." Our library "Love, family, sex and about ..." contains almost all of his books.

If the result of sociological research is less than the statistical error, this means that it will not be a mistake if we accept that the phenomenon under study (love) is generally absent in married life.

... falling in love, love and passion, which are elements of the same synonymous series.
K.filol.n S.V. Valiulina

The above statistics also confirm that at the everyday, subconscious level, all native speakers of the Russian language confuse love with being in love, which means that they marry out of love, not out of love.

But on the cognitive level, most people distinguish between them, and when asked directly, they will express their position about the differences between love and being in love.

Even more sadness and tragedy with the ecology of love is given in This is a malicious word "love". E. Pushkarev

Aspect 5.

More precisely, a new psychosexology. In the twentieth century, so many discoveries were made in sexology, especially female sexology, that one can say: "there was no sex before this."

Psychosexology. Konstantin Selchenok

In a scientific work (late 19th century) W. Acton "Functions and dysfunctions of the reproductive organs": "It would be a heinous slander to say that women are capable of sexual feelings ".

In the 1920s, nearly two-thirds of American women complained of excessive sexual activity from their husbands; Now this opinion is shared by only 5%, and in 12% of marriages, wives are dissatisfied with the number of sexual contacts.

The era of highly technical sex has arrived.

All articles, books and videos about sex, orgasms (M and F) and their implications.

Sex positions from the point of view of ... psychology.

Sexuality, female and male orgasms.

Sex in the family and at work. M.E. Litvak.

Sexuality. Robert Crooks, Karla Baur.

Sexual Injury Rating.

Sexual preferences of psychotypes.

Sexual compatibility of socionic psychotypes

Love, Sex, Partnership: Orientations of Moscow Students L. Borusyak

Sexy man. Sexual culture. F.I. Minushev

Love and robots. Will Humanity Become Digisexual? F.G. Maylenova

Sexual signals and true love. M. Lusher

The psychology of love becomes clear if you stop confusing love as a cultural (ontogenetic) concept with love as a natural (phylogenetic) phenomenon .

E. Pushkarev Chairman of the Internet Club "ENLIGHTED LOVE"

The most read articles on our site are:

Guide to the site and the main milestones in the knowledge of love. E. Pushkarev

The essence of love. E. Pushkarev.

What is love. E. Pushkarev

Briefly about love. E. Pushkarev

Falling in love. E. Pushkarev

Man and woman: compatibility, love. E. Pushkarev

Man and woman: relationships. E. Pushkarev

Man and woman: leadership in love and marriage. E Pushkarev

Love test: "love scale" by Z. Rubin.

Sigmund Freud about love. E. Pushkarev

Love test: "love scale" by Z. Rubin.

Classification of psychosexual types.

Riddles of sexual compatibility. V.V. Meged.

and also sections:

Psychology of love.

Site map.

Эрих Фромм

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Экология и драматургия любви

Наш сайт о природе любви мужчины и женщины: истоки, течение, около любовные переживания и расстройства.


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По моей книге уже с 2010 года обучают студентов по Программе дисциплины – «Психология любви»

Чтобы познакомиться бесплатно скачайте Это презентация моей книги

Из книги вы узнаете: любовь между мужчиной и женщиной исключительно положительное чувство. А очень похожая влюбленность с любовью никак не связана. А недоброкачественная влюбленность - мания, она же "наркоманическая любовь", "сверхизбирательная любовь" "folle amore" (безумная любовь (ит.) не только никакого отношения к любви не имеет, а и совсем болезненное расстройство.

А научиться их различать не так уж и сложно.

У человека нет врожденного дара, отличать любовь от влюбленностей, других

псевдолюбовных состояний это можно сделать только овладев знаниями.

Жизнь удалась

Примеры настоящей любви

Пара влюбленных

Драматичные влюбленности известных людей, которые не сделали их счастливыми