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Sinful, obsessive, bad, terrible thoughts ... (obsession) that interfere with my life come into my head.

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It's all about thoughts. Thought is the beginning of everything. And thoughts can be controlled. Therefore, the main thing in self-improvement - working on your thoughts.
L. Tolstoy

Sinful, obsessive, bad, bad, scary, terrible thoughts ... (obsession) that interfere with my life are coming into my head Letters repeatedly came to the Club with the question: "Sinful, obsessive, bad, bad, terrible, terrible thoughts come into my head ..., I am going crazy, I am already exhausted, they are poisoning my life, I have already got it, to the point of tears ...". How to be?

As a rule, these are the consequences of internal troubles, once received traumas, problems unresolved in a timely manner, difficulties with self-esteem, life roles, what forms poor psychological health.

Obsessive thoughts and doubts are parasites that steal our life energy, so they need to be neutralized without delay.

Often obsessive thoughts do not withstand a gaze. Any self-observation, analysis, preparation leads to their weakening and obsolescence. They are like lousy dogs that rush and bark at passers-by for no reason, because they like to pester people, and the more people are afraid of them, the more insolent they behave. But if you shout at her, especially raise and throw a stone, she will immediately run away, her tail between her legs.

Obsessive thoughts are afraid of "light", publicity, publicity. If you share these thoughts with a loved one, they can immediately evaporate. This is what is called vest crying. That is why sincere, soulful stories to unfamiliar people, such as on trains, are so popular. The other extreme of this technique is when people abuse it. And as they say, they load friends and relatives with their spiritual rubbish left and right.

Take the Helen Fisher test to select the best partner hormonal compatibility.

Self-identified problems cannot be solved in five minutes, but they can and should be solved. Start by writing down the thoughts that are pestering you on paper.

Psychologists have long noticed that the mental and written experience of the same problem, in different ways, involve the brain in the process. The recorded experiences acquire a different color, a different plot of development and, naturally, a different final decision than with a mental one. The written experience of hyperstress proceeds more constructively and does not leave behind mental "scars".

This is due to the fact that when an emotionally colored task is thought out, one number of brain centers are involved, and when thinking is carried out in the ear, the auditory and articular parts of the brain are also involved in the intellectual operation. Maybe you have noticed that in extremely difficult situations, a person begins to think aloud, whisper, move his lips, thereby the brain involuntarily from consciousness includes additional reserves. Those. the more parts of the brain are involved, the more productively the task is solved, and the stressful situation is experienced in a softer way.

Using the analogy of the saying "one head is good, two is better", one brain center is involved - one quality and speed of the solution, and the use of 4 centers is a noticeable improvement in the quality and speed of the decision. It is precisely this number of brain centers that are involved in the written processing of information with articulation, these are visual, auditory, articular and motor.

In addition, when considering complex psychological situations in writing, the speed of the intellectual process changes, and the speed of written processing of information is the most effective and productive.

While writing, according to the laws of functional asymmetry of the brain, the left hemisphere is most active, and its specialization is positive emotions. Therefore, during the description of everyday complexity, stress, the situation is experienced in more positive tones. After all, the situation experienced under the guidance of "specialists" in positive emotions always has a more optimistic outcome. This psychotechnique even has its own name, writing therapy or scribotherapy (Latin scribio - "to write" and therapia - "treatment").

This is probably why cheat sheets are so popular among students. Indeed, when writing them, there is an improved quality of assimilation of information, memorization, harmonization of nervous processes. A person has long noticed a favorable result of recording everyday events, diaries.

From the memoirs of Charles Aznavour: “When it was very hard for me, I took a pencil in my hands and wrote. Sometimes it was poetry, sometimes it was the source of poetry. Later I could not understand or make out some of the notes. And the pencil saved me . Only later did I find out that there were people who dreamed of driving me to suicide".

They described their obsessive thoughts, put aside the piece of paper, re-read it for tomorrow, described it again in more detail and with new emotional clarifications. And when you get a description of unwanted thoughts in several pages, these uninvited guests will no longer invade your head so unceremoniously, these descriptions will reason with them, and then completely neutralize them. Many people suffering from obsessive thoughts got rid of them after a detailed and comprehensive description of them.

An important point in dealing with intrusive thoughts is sincerity.

The Strugatsky brothers in the story "Roadside Picnic" wrote about what the confusion in their own thoughts, experiences, feelings leads to as follows. When one of the stalkers asked the Zone for the fulfillment of his greatest desire - health, for his sick son, the Zone gave him a bag of money. Because the stalker's desire to have a lot of money was long-standing, old and large, surpassing the desire for health for his son, which he did not even think about.

Therefore, first you need to achieve sincerity with yourself and place thoughts, dreams, desires, fantasies, whims in their places and never confuse them in life. Doctor of Psychological Sciences, Professor Rudolf Zagainov says that this problem is not entirely simple: "Unlike people with a" Western "mentality, who willingly make contact and honestly tell a psychologist about their concerns, our person is either completely closed, or" disguised. "That is, he gives out information about himself in the form of a version, speaking not only as an interlocutor, but also as a lawyer. The most problematic in the mentality of our person is a pathological tendency to insincerity, the fear of telling the truth about himself. Lies at every step, life in the aura of the legend about his past, always his own point of view on the present, the fog of the future: "

In the book "Secrets of a successful life" V.F. Kaloshin has a chapter: Thought control is an effective means of achieving happiness, health, success ...".

Karen Casey “Change your thoughts - life will change. 12 simple principles".

Igor Kudryavtsev “The power of thought. Find the state of "WORLD" your source of health, peace and joy".

Sally M. Winston Martin N. Safe “Getting rid of obsessive thoughts. A Guide to Overcoming Stress and Anxiety "

Books are in our library "Love, family, sex and about ..."

Alicia Eaton gives specific advice on how to get rid of obsessive thoughts and other problems in her book “Change your life with NLP

The book is in our library "Love, family, sex and about ...". Anyone who is not yet familiar with NLP is better off reading the book in more detail, everything is clearly written there.

How to Use This Book: Ambulance for the Brain

In the first chapters, we'll talk about how your brain works: how information is absorbed, processed, and transformed into your thoughts and behavior. You will learn what NLP is and where it belongs in history. As you complete the exercises and activities in this section, you will prepare yourself to solve your own problems with NLP.

In Chapters 9-13, we discuss the five issues in more detail. We'll cover habits and motivation, weight loss, confidence, fears and phobias, health and wellness. You will find not only tips and ideas here, but also stories of my clients. You will understand how easy it is to make change with these techniques.

In Chapter 14, you will find “applications” for the brain. I took the well-known NLP techniques and formulated them so that you can easily use them and literally "load" them into your brain.

Downloading Apps from this book will not only help you look at your problems differently, but it will also make your brain more flexible, creative, and able to deal with future problems.

Other life-changing books require readers to follow a specific plan or program from start to finish. Such books are quickly put off and forgotten. I suggest using my book as a reference and referring to it constantly. Young or old, successful or not, you will find something useful here. Our life is unpredictable, and you will never know when this book may be useful to you.

Mend your life

It is often said that our mind is like a computer. In fact, the opposite is true: computers are like our minds. Computer scientists studied the structure and work of the human brain and built their information processing systems in a similar way. Even the digital imaging software in your camera is based on the principles of the human eye.

The mind, like a computer, can always pick up a virus, that is, accidentally "download" an unwanted standard of behavior.

Whatever your problem - fear of flying, fear of public speaking, or a bad habit like smoking or overeating - you must not be fooled: you were not born with this problem. You accidentally loaded it into your "operating system" and put up with it just because you don't understand how to fix it!

When a computer stops working efficiently, we immediately call a specialist who fixes everything, and our computer continues to work as before.

Alas, most people care better about computers than their minds. We install antivirus software, pay for an annual service, to keep our precious computers safe. We understand that over time, problems may arise that will need to be resolved and corrected.

If we treated our own brain in the same way, then it would work much more efficiently, and we would have fewer problems.

Serving the mind and erasing unwanted habits and behaviors should become a habit essential for future happiness and health.

Think about your last illness: a cold, flu, or an upset stomach. Or a minor injury: a sprained leg or back. Like most people, you probably took steps right away to start the healing process. Pain pills, a warm bath, an ice pack, a tight bandage, rest and relaxation, honey and lemon, homeopathy - there are a lot of options.

Although we calmly cope with minor ailments on our own or with the help of the Internet, deep down we understand that "problems of the mind" should be solved with the help of specialists. But then we begin to think that we need to find a sufficiently reliable professional, spend a lot of time and money on it ... And we abandon this thought. Fear and laziness make us waddle through life with a mind in need of "service." We put up with our limitations and believe that it is not in our power to fix something.

Many people are much better and more attentive to their computers. We are happy to download applications - additional programs that expand the capabilities of the equipment ... And what success could we achieve if we had “applications” for the mind? If you could load an application into your mind right now, which one would you choose? The app shouldn't change you. It will simply allow you to become a more advanced version of yourself. What additional abilities would you choose? Who would you be and where would you go?

REMEMBER THIS You can download an “app” for the brain in the same way you download an application to your phone or computer.

Sounds too good to be true? Well, this book will help you become the master of your own life and establish complete control over your mind, not allowing others or events to control your mind for you.

Take control of your own mind

Instead of simply accepting your mental images, you can establish control over them by changing submodalities. The best way to understand how submodalities can change your thoughts is through play. Play with them. Imagine that you have a remote control in your hands.

Exercise: IMAGE PLAY Take the time to do this exercise. Take breaks between stages. It will be easier for you to do this exercise with a friend or colleague.

1. Let's start with a new image. Think of a happy moment in life: a party, an event, or the moment when you were praised or complimented.

2. Become aware of the formed image.

3. Is it colored or black and white?

4. Make it colored, correct the colors, make the picture brighter, deeper, more distinct.

5. Notice how your feelings have changed.

6. Now remove the colors, make the picture black and white.

7. Notice the change in your feelings.

8. Bring back the color and brightness to the image.

9. Now move the picture: move it far, very far, so that it becomes barely distinguishable.

10. Now bring her back figuratively, closer to you. Place it directly in front of you.

11. Are there any sounds coming up in your memory? Can you hear other people's voices?

12. Make the sound louder ... And even louder ... And more ...

13. And now - quieter ... Gradually remove the sound until it disappears completely.

14. Now increase the volume again to hear all sounds clearly again.

15. If you are “dissociated” (that is, you see your whole self inside the memory), try to “associate” (that is, put yourself into an image, re-experience everything as before).

16. If your picture is still, turn it into a movie. Let everything start moving.

17. Now stop the image, bring it closer to you, try to see bright colors, hear loud sounds.

18. Note your feelings.

19. Can you point to an image? Where is it: to the right, in front of or to the side of you?

Now that you've played with this image, think of something that is unpleasant for you. Which changes enhance positive feelings and which ones decrease?

Having understood how the manifestation of thoughts in images, words and feelings affects your mood and behavior, you will immediately receive at your disposal the most valuable tool that will allow you to become the master of your life. You will learn how to translate this "code" into other thoughts and ideas. Your images of the appropriate size, shape, color, intimacy and volume will begin to evoke kind and positive feelings in you.

You will learn to get rid of sad and dreary thoughts, anxiety, lack of motivation and other negative manifestations at your own discretion.

Getting rid of negative images

If I come to your house in the evening, turn on your TV and start switching channels in search of something interesting for me, a very serious problem will arise in your life. Will you sit still and watch my actions? Do you accept the fact that every evening you will be at home reminded of what you would rather forget about?

Most will answer this question: "Of course not!" But in fact, we all do just that. We keep in our minds images of what annoys and torments us the most. Some people make real films - bright and impressive. People relive the terrible moments of their lives over and over again. And then they still wonder why it suddenly became so bad for them!

I want to please you: there is a very simple way to get rid of such thoughts and images using the "remote control".

Exercise: REMOVING NEGATIVE FEELINGS If this is your first time doing this, do not choose a memory that is too traumatic. Once you get used to it, you can deal with bigger problems. Think of a minor disagreement. Have you noticed that you are replaying this event in your head over and over again? Consider my TV example: why are you doing this over and over again? Why are you playing this nasty movie if it doesn't make you feel positive?

1. Come back to the bad moment.

2. Understand where the image is placed.

3. Is the picture color or black and white?

4. Do you hear any sounds?

5. What is the size of the picture?

6. Is there a border around it?

OK! Now let's change the picture:

1. If it was in color, make it black and white.

2. Squeeze it.

3. Turn down the volume to hear no more voices.

4. Move the picture away from you.

5. Squeeze it into a dot.

6. Now imagine that you take a paintbrush and paint over it with white.

7. Make it indistinguishable.

8. Notice how your feelings have changed.

Positive mental images evoke positive feelings, while negative mental images evoke negative ones. Close and vivid imagery enhances the experience. Remember this and you will have control over your feelings. Images that are devoid of color and located in the distance are less intense, which means they have a less powerful effect on your feelings.

Our inner ideas (or images) affect our feelings. In NLP terms, we call this our state. The condition has a direct impact on physiology. This is why happy people have good posture and when depressed our shoulders drop. Internal ideas, state and physiology are interconnected and affect each other. This is why happy people attract good luck, and unhappy people ask for problems themselves. Your condition affects what happens to you.

Switch your senses

Feelings, sensations, and reactions in our body can be triggered by a wide variety of stimuli, not just our thoughts. The connection between stimulus and response is called anchoring. In other words, environmental factors - sounds, smells, melodies or thoughts - evoke a certain reaction in us. Such a reaction can be happiness, sadness, nervousness, anxiety, confidence, delight. The reaction arises automatically, you cannot control it if you do not understand what is happening.

Anchors surround us everywhere. As soon as we hear some music, we are seized by a certain emotion. Music outside the ice cream stand can evoke childhood memories.

Smells cause especially strong reactions: the smell of perfume can remind you of the delight of a first date. But the smell of food you've been poisoned with can cause a very negative reaction. These automatic reactions occur throughout the day.

Anchoring is one of the most popular NLP techniques. It is easy to master, and its effectiveness is high. With its help, you learn to transfer yourself to any state of your choice - as if by magic.

This connection was discovered by the great Russian scientist Ivan Pavlov. Pavlov conducted experiments on dogs. Every time the dogs were given food, saliva began to be produced. Pavlov began to ring the bell at every feeding. Dogs soon learned to associate the sound of bells with feeding.

And then only sound became enough for saliva secretion - without any food. The dogs did not see food, did not smell it, but saliva began to stand out. Bodies reacted automatically to sound even if they weren't hungry.

NLP uses the same principle to create anchors, but this time connections and associations are formed deliberately. Creating anchors allows you to change feelings and transition:

► from fortunes doubts - v condition confidence ;

► from slowness - to motivation;

► from apathy - To limitless energy ;

► from fortunes stress - v condition relaxation ;

► from anger - To rest ;

► from melancholy - To happiness ;

► from fear - To courage .


Close your eyes - read all the instructions beforehand so you know exactly what to do, or have a friend read them to you as you go through the exercise.

Squeeze your thumb and middle fingers - for this exercise, choose the hand with which you write.

1. Find a suitable spot, sit back and relax completely.

2. Think back to that moment in the past when you felt absolutely happy and satisfied.

3. Close your eyes and return to that moment. You need to see everything that you saw then, hear what you heard, and feel what you felt.

4. Become aware of everything you see. Make the picture bigger. Make the colors brighter, stronger. If at that moment you heard something, make the sounds louder.

5. Make the picture even bigger. Bring her closer to you.

6. If in this picture you see yourself (dissociation), then imagine how you rise from the chair and merge with your image in the picture.

7. Become yourself and enjoy repeating the happy moment.

8. Focus on the moment when you felt genuine happiness.

9. As you continue to admire the painting, realize exactly where this feeling of happiness arises in your body.

10. Identify the place of origin of the feeling. Make it spin faster, spread all over your body. Happiness should sweep you from head to toe.

11. Continue this process until you feel the delicious sensation has reached its peak.

12. As this feeling intensifies, squeeze your thumb and middle fingers. Squeeze them very tightly. With these fingers you are holding a feeling of complete happiness.

13. Now relax. Relax and open your eyes. Come back to reality.

14. When you want to feel this delicious feeling again, you just need to squeeze your thumb and middle fingers.

Do this exercise several times a day to make your happiness anchor more powerful.

You can enhance the feelings associated with this anchor, remembering to squeeze your thumb and middle fingers in those moments when something good happens to you: when you watch a comedy, listen to an interesting program, have fun with friends, receive a compliment from a loved one.

The NLP technique described above is used with the kind permission of Richard Bandler.

Having mastered this anchor, you can automatically generate positive feelings in yourself. To do this, you just need to squeeze your thumb and middle fingers. You can create other anchors for yourself - read Appendices 10, 15 and 18.

"Oculomotor" getting rid of problematic thoughts and states.

Advice from Doctor of Psychology, Doctor of Philosophy, Professor Sergei Kovalev from the book “Self-correction of a“ lame ”fate. How to take the correction of your destiny into your own hands. "The book is in our library "Love, family, sex and about ...".

This book is a whole encyclopedia of practical tips for using NLP.

It is based on eye movements and the connection that arises between them and the corresponding modes of the brain. This direct connection was first proven by NLP specialists. But, they probably forgot to mention the possibilities of feedback (if a certain mode of operation of the brain sets the position of our eyes, then changing their position allows us to change the mode itself).

Therefore, the merit in the creation of an independent psychotechnology of "oculomotor reprogramming" is attributed to a specialist in a completely different field - the American F. Shapiro. A vital necessity pushed her to create this psychotechnology: at the age of thirty-six, a woman was diagnosed with breast cancer. After surgery for this disease, Shapiro, a literary scholar by training, could not get rid of nightmares and daytime fears and anxieties until she discovered that she could significantly reduce them if she intensively moved her gaze in different directions. After much experimentation with herself and others, Shapiro unveiled her psychotechnology, which is today known as the eye movement desensitization technique (EMA).

The full scheme of using DPDG is as follows (after: F. Shapiro "Psychotherapy of emotional trauma using eye movements").

1. Think about your problem and focus on an image that represents either all of it or the most traumatic part of you. It is desirable that the full VAKD (backstory) be present in this image, although this is not required.

2. Identify or formulate statements that are characteristic of your negative self-determination, that is, that negative thought-self-esteem that accompanies this trouble (or that you took out of it), for example: I am powerless (on).

I can't do anything. I am nothing. I cannot succeed. I am not worthy of success.

3. Create a judgment that reflects your positive self-determination about a given trouble, that is, what should be present in your consciousness and unconscious instead of the negative self-image in which you are stuck, for example: I have the necessary resources. I can do a lot. I am a person worthy of respect. I can do well. I am worthy of success.

4. Rate your own belief in this new positive self-determination on a seven-point scale, where 1 is “I do not completely believe”, and 7 is “I completely believe”. Do not be surprised that your assessment is in the range of 1-2 points - so, alas, it should be for now.

5. Now, on a ten-point scale, rate the level of your own anxiety about the original trouble. Here 10 points will correspond to the maximum anxiety, and 1 point - to the minimum. Again, do not be surprised by the score of 8-9-10 points. It should not be otherwise, because this very nuisance is firmly stuck in you and does not want to go anywhere unaided. But the level of grades of 3-4 points indicates that you are doing nonsense - you can cope with this without DPDG.

6. Now take the final step in preparing for eye movement desensitization. Determine the optimal speed and amplitude of movement of your eyes with your own (even better - someone else's) hand. The “gaze fixation point” will be two closed fingers - the index and middle. Do this evaluative definition for

• horizontal eye movements

• "diagonal" movements ("big eight"):

- vertical (8) and horizontal (8),

• movements in a circle (O)

7. Remember the VAKD of your trouble and, while thinking about it, do a series of 24 eye movements. Start with horizontal, for example. After finishing the series, throw everything out of your head and take a deep breath in and out. Then go back to the image and explore:

• what you are currently experiencing about this image;

• what you now think about your trouble. Then rate your anxiety level on a scale of ten. And repeat all of the above until the level of anxiety about the trouble is reduced to what is acceptable to you. There are no exact norms here, but grades of 2-3 points are close to a sufficient level.

8. Now focus on presenting your chosen positive self-definition (just think about it) along with (at the same time) remembering your trouble (its image) and continue the series of eye movements until belief in this most positive idea reaches a level that is acceptable to you ( usually 5 points or more).

9. Finally, after the positive self-determination is sufficiently established, holding both it and the image of trouble, investigate if there are any unpleasant sensations or tensions left in your body. If there are any, focus on them and carry out the required number of series of eye movements until everything is gone: both these sensations and what will “emerge” while you work them out.

Pay attention to one very important point: with the help of DPDG (more precisely, through eye movements), you can quite easily reprogram yourself to new beliefs. In the future, this will be very useful to us, but for now we will turn to phobias.

Another psychotechnique:

Crossing (pushing) anchors. Let's move on to perhaps the most important of the hypostases of anchoring - the technique of crossing anchors. Tell me what happens when you mix red and yellow? That's right - orange. And if you mix cold with hot? Warm. If you bring good and bad together? Quite right, the result will be something neutral.

It is this principle of "mixing" of two opposite neurological processes that underlies a very powerful technique of pushing, or crossing, anchors.

In NLP, it is recommended to cross anchors according to the following scheme, taken by me from old materials for seminars on neurolinguistic programming IGISP (the author of this description is not known to me).

1. Sit back, remember a time when you were especially confident, full of creative energy, or simply healthy (choose one).

2. Anchor this memory to your right knee by lightly pressing on it with your right hand. Make sure you anchor at exactly the moment when you are experiencing the memory most intensely.

3. Now remember a situation from your activity in which you were insecure, felt lethargic, or just were sick (also for now, choose one that is most appropriate). Place the anchor with your left hand on your left knee.

4. With both hands, press both anchors at the same time. As a result, the two behaviors collide at the same time and place, so it will be necessary to integrate them neurologically. Resource and non-resource behavior (state) will merge, forcing your brain to seek new opportunities in a situation that was previously perceived as problematic and / or change the state from unhealthy to healthier.

5. Now imagine a problem situation in the future. If your work has been successful, you will find that it is much easier for you to become resourceful in a given situation (as you imagine the situation, signs of a resource state will appear). And rest assured that later on you can really experience "resourcefulness" when you find yourself in a corresponding problem situation.

Again, returning to the "through" example, I can hint to you (in fact, it's time for you to concretize, that is, as if by yourself, "tie" techniques "to the terrain") that if you anchor your own straightforwardness, and after "crossing" it with flexibility of behavior (no matter where, at least with your children), then, at least, noticeably reduce this very tendency of yours to "head-on" interactions.

In order for you to properly master this very useful procedure, I will give you a description of the technique (technique) for installing linked anchors, in which its main (procedure) technical points are described in more detail (according to: S. Knight "Guide to NLP").

1. Determine what unproductive state you are going to work with. For example, it can be a state of anxiety, despondency, insecurity, or frustration.

2. Imagine that you are experiencing this state, and anchor by touching the index finger of one hand to the knuckle of the other hand. Repeat to make sure the anchor works. Please note that this condition should be short-lived.

3. Also define another, transitional, state. It could be some kind of funny memory or just something that requires focused thinking (say, just mentally replaying your phone number in reverse order).

4. Choose your desired productive state, such as one in which you feel completely safe, calm, or confident in your own abilities. Relive the situation in which you experienced the chosen feeling. When the intensity of the feeling is at its maximum, set the anchor by touching the middle finger of one hand to the knuckle of the other hand.

5. Test these anchors by following these steps:

• Use a transient state.

• Turn on the first anchor.

• Use a transient state.

• Turn on the second anchor.

If the anchors do not work, repeat the installation processes.

6. Now use both anchors at the same time. You will feel some confusion, as if the two states merged into one new, mixed state. If the first unproductive state is still strongly felt in the new mixed state, then go back to step 4, select a more intense state and re-anchor. Please check again. You may also find that the situation will improve if you turn on the productive anchor a second or a couple of seconds before the nonproductive anchor.

7. Now imagine a future situation that in the past has usually put you in an unproductive state. What happens when you imagine this future situation? If the folded anchors are working, then this unproductive state will no longer manifest.

However, I cannot but warn you against a certain danger associated with the technique of crossing anchors. The fact is that we algebraically sum up positive and negative values, which is why the result can be the most ordinary zero. Suppose, for example, that you decide to apply this technique to a situation of your fear of dogs, for which you decide to use your apparent love for cats. Having anchored these two states, you “turn on” both anchors at the same time, after which you discover the following curious thing. You really are already almost completely not afraid of dogs, and this, as they say, is a plus. But at the same time, you began to love cats noticeably less, and this can already be considered as a kind of minus. So in the process of reprogramming, it is necessary to ensure that the power of the positive anchor noticeably exceeds the power of the negative anchor, and that it (the positive anchor) touches something not too important.

However, this danger is rather illusory and easily surmountable. I only mentioned it so that you do not get trapped and do not fall into a woeful bewilderment about the relativity of your successes and their consequences. Indeed, firstly, in order to gain flexibility in behavior in a situation of communication with your peers in status (this is an example), in the worst case, you will somewhat lose this flexibility in a case similar to that used in the resource experience. In all other cases, your flexibility will remain. Moreover, it is very likely that it will recover quickly enough in the situation that served as a resource.

Secondly, purely technically, to enhance the impact of resource anchors, you can simply do crossbreeding several times according to the following simple principle. If the first time, for example, you only achieved less straightforwardness, re-anchor this diminished self-sabotage factor and cross it with another resource experience of flexibility. And so on until you reach the desired level of the success factor.

And thirdly, no one forbids you to take advantage of another opportunity, which is the indirect and repeated resource of the qualities and states that are necessary and useful to you "in life".

In his interesting and useful book “Self-correction of a“ lame ”fate. How to take the correction of your destiny into your own hands "Professor Sergei Kovalev, gives not only advice on how to get rid of unnecessary thoughts, states, but also how to replace non-ecological thoughts, beliefs, behavior with eco-friendly:

“Check out the statements listed here and mark any that you think would be difficult to believe about yourself. Reread statements that you cannot defend with all your heart.

When you've done this for all the statements you question, pick one and ask yourself why? Write down your reasons. Use your imagination to go back in time and try to find out why you cannot “validate” yourself. Whose voice do you hear? What words tell you? What shapes do you see? What gestures do you use? The ability to assert ourselves inevitably has its roots in how other people approve of us, and vice versa.

It will not be easy for you to replace a negative statement with a positive one. However, if you believe that it can be changed, you will eventually come to believe in yourself.

• I am me, and in the whole world there is no one exactly like me.

• I'm unique.

• I own everything that touches me — my body and everything that touches it.

• I own my mind, including all my thoughts and ideas.

• I own my eyes, including the images of all observed objects.

• I own my feelings, whatever they are - positive and negative. I may like some and dislike others, but they are still mine.

• I own my mouth and all the words that I say, pleasant or rude, right or wrong.

• I own my voice, loud or quiet.

• I own all my actions in relation to others or to myself.

• I own my fantasies, my dreams, my hopes, my fears.

• I own all my triumphs and successes, all my failures and mistakes.

• Since I am in complete control of myself, I can ultimately recognize and use myself to act to my advantage.

• There are things that puzzle me and others that I don't know yet. But as long as I am friendly with myself, I can, with courage and hope, seek out solutions to puzzles and ways to learn more about myself.

• No matter how I look and sound & any given moment, it is unique and authentic to me.

• When I think about how I looked and sounded, what I said and did, how I thought and felt, I can drop whatever I want. I can keep what is appropriate. I can invent something new instead of what I have discarded.

• I can see, hear, feel, think, say and do. I have the tools to survive, be close to others, be productive, and extract meaning and order from the world of people and things outside of me.

• I am in control of myself, therefore, I can change myself.

• I am me, and I am good.

I forgive myself for any mistake and wrongdoing in relation to myself. I forgive all the wrongs that other people have caused me.

• I accept responsibility for my own life and affirm that no one has power over my decisions without my full consent".

Another effective psychotechnique NLP "Sweep"

Albina Chaikina writes in detail, with a description of all the subtleties in her book "The Main Psychotechnics of Highly Effective People". The book is in our library "Love, family, sex and about ...":

Pavel Morozov, our designer, went to the nlpers first after her (Alka, who got rid of her excess weight and became a statuette). He had wanted to quit smoking for a long time, but nothing worked for him. A corresponding session was conducted with him - and since then (and four months have passed) he stopped poisoning himself with nicotine. Further down the beaten path to NLP, the rest rushed: one got rid of the fear of dogs, the other stopped being annoyed with her husband's relatives and saved the family, Ira Smirnova managed to defeat asthmatic attacks from her 15-year-old son, another swing helped us and our friends, relatives and acquaintances win impotence, alcohol addiction, passion for slot machines, such "cute" habits as nail biting and nose picking. Some even stopped stuttering and overcame the fear of heights.

It was clear that we had access to a very powerful, accurate, virtually trouble-free technique, thanks to which you can solve a bunch of any questions! The further, the more I was interested in the swing method. I started studying the issue, dug into the principles of NLP. I really wanted to tell about the technique to as many people as possible.

Sweep the steps.

1. Definition of the situation. We formulate the undesirable things that we would like to get rid of, be it a habit, fear, phobia, addiction, etc.

2. Identification of secondary benefits. We analyze what our “bad” behavior allows us to achieve, what motives, apart from the obvious ones, lie at its basis.

3. Analyzing how secondary benefits can be achieved differently. Here are the options (three for each benefit).

4. Declaration of Intent: Finding out if the client agrees to extract secondary benefits differently.

5. Ecological check: we check if giving up “bad” behavior will harm the client.

6. Determination of the stimulus. Finding what exactly triggers the "bad" behavior. We check the associated stimulus - we look at it "from the situation."

7. Presentation of a stimulus on an internal screen. Creation of the initial picture.

8. Working with a stimulus involving two submodalities: zoom in and out, zoom in and out, make it flat-volumetric, color-black-and-white, sharp-blurred, bright-faded.

9. Definition of self-resource. We create an idea of ourselves as having overcome "bad" behavior: how I should look like, who no longer possesses what I want to get rid of. We check the dissociation of the image: I want to be like that, I like this resource-self, I strive to become like that. But while I'm not like that - a picture from the outside.

10. Representation of the self-resource on the inner screen. Creation of a picture without a background (with a blurry, undefined background).

11. Connection on the inner screen of two pictures - stimulus and self-resource. The image of the stimulus is full screen, with such submodalities that it evokes the maximum of emotions; the image of the self-resource is very small, indistinct, in the lower right corner of the internal screen, occupied by the image of the stimulus.

12. Swing. Very quickly (at the expense of “one”, by clicking fingers, wave of the hand), reduce the image of the stimulus and remove it from the screen, and enlarge the image of the I-resource to the size of the screen (submodalities work in such a way that this image makes the maximum impression on you).

13. Look at the image of the self-resource, then clear the screen (for example, open your eyes).

14. Swing four or six more times.

15. Checking the results:

• Presentation of stimulus. Again, on the inner screen, you try to present the stimulus - as in preparation for the swing. Its outlines this time should be indistinct, blurry.

• Adjustment to the future. Imagine situations in the future in which you could theoretically demonstrate "bad" behavior again. Can you imagine yourself abandoning old stereotypes, refraining from appropriate behavioral patterns? If so, the swing was successful.

Here's how the Internet can help.


Pixelthoughts is a service that allows you to immerse yourself in a 60-second meditation and relax, clearing your thoughts of negativity, obsessive problems.

You just need to enter in the "What's bothering you?" (What bothers you?) Your problem, and then press the "Done" button and watch how the luminous ball, along with your problem, moves away from you to pleasant music.

In the upper right corner of the screen there is a small square, by clicking on which, you can expand the main page of the service to full screen. This will allow you to fully immerse yourself in what is happening. To exit full screen mode, press the Esc key on your keyboard.

At the very end, you will be asked to subscribe so as not to miss the release of other projects.

Have fun getting rid of the negativity!

If the above tips and techniques did not help you, use the book from our libraries :

Pavel Fedorenko, Anastasia Bubnova "Happy life without obsessive thoughts"
And you will learn how to get rid of the most common obsessive thoughts of aggression and violence:

I will harm someone, for example, a loved one, when, suddenly, there is a desire to hit someone or harm myself.

Awful thoughts about loved ones.

I go to the window, on the balcony I am afraid that I will jump.

Thoughts related to a religious theme, obscenities in the church.

Thoughts about getting cancer, epilepsy ... mental disorders.

A wide range of sexual topics. Incestuous sexual intercourse. Desires to be raped

Men have an obsession with being homosexual. At the same time, there are no objective signs.

You can also get help:

"Curbing the Senses"
"How to improve your mood in one minute"
From the book “NLP. Modern psychotechnology "Harry Alder

NLP literature uses many special terms, their dictionary with explanations is given in the book "NLP. Modern psychotechnology "Harry Alder

Books are in our library "Love, family, sex and about ..."

E. Pushkarev Chairman of the Internet Club "ENLIGHTED LOVE"

In our library "Love, family, sex and about ..." there is a section All books on NLP - neurolinguistic programming

This is one of the chapters of the book "LOVE! GOOD OR EVIL? Psychological dimensions.

Related articles:
Please help me figure it out. E. Pushkarev

About love for oneself or the reason for unhappy love for another. E. Pushkarev

The essence of love. E. Pushkarev.

What is love. E. Pushkarev

Man and woman: compatibility, love. E. Pushkarev

Man and woman: relationships. E. Pushkarev

Psychology of love. E. Pushkarev

Love test: "love scale" by Z. Rubin.

Love is not for the infantile! E. Belyakova

Who needs professional psychological help and in what cases? I. and L. Shiryaevs

Be yourself. A. Babin

Purposeful personality development: what can be changed in oneself. V. Odintsov

Who needs psychotherapy? E. Zolotukhina-Abolina

Your own psychotherapist! E. Zolotukhina-Abolina

Sigmund Freud about love.

For those who prefer to independently solve their mental problems in our library “Love, family, sex and about...". there is a section His own psychologist. And it has a large shelf of NLP books.

Эрих Фромм

Поиск по сайту

Желающие оказать спонсорскую поддержку Интернет - клубу "ПРОСВЕЩЕННАЯ ЛЮБОВЬ" могут это сделать через

ЮMoney https://yoomoney.ru :

кошелек 410014252323944

или Сберкарту, подробности : club1@mail.ru

Заранее благодарны.

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Экология и драматургия любви

Наш сайт о природе любви мужчины и женщины: истоки, течение, около любовные переживания и расстройства.

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По моей книге уже с 2010 года обучают студентов по Программе дисциплины – «Психология любви»

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Из книги вы узнаете: любовь между мужчиной и женщиной исключительно положительное чувство. А очень похожая влюбленность с любовью никак не связана. А недоброкачественная влюбленность - мания, она же "наркоманическая любовь", "сверхизбирательная любовь" "folle amore" (безумная любовь (ит.) не только никакого отношения к любви не имеет, а и совсем болезненное расстройство.

А научиться их различать не так уж и сложно.

У человека нет врожденного дара, отличать любовь от влюбленностей, других

псевдолюбовных состояний это можно сделать только овладев знаниями.

Жизнь удалась

Примеры настоящей любви

Пара влюбленных

Драматичные влюбленности известных людей, которые не сделали их счастливыми